Forget time share, I want a cow share!

Seriously! 

I am being completely serious here.

I grew up in rural Southern Idaho but I was a townie. My father was a teacher,  and my mother still works for a farm equipment company. So farming was something I was vaguely familiar with but hadn't ever really done. We had a vegetable garden for several years and my husband and I have had a veg garden every year we've had a house, more or less.

Then several things happened over the course of many years that changed my view of farming.
First this country girl (who coincidentally had never thought of herself as such) moved to the "Big City!" 

Now don't laugh. 

Coming from a small town where everyone knew everyone; Salt Lake City seemed huge.  It took 20 minutes to get from my small town to the "big" town where the mall is and between them were fields as far as they eye can see, and cows.  Lots of cows.  In Salt Lake everything runs together. You can't tell where one town begins and another ends! So to me it seemed so large! 
And freeway driving!? FORGET IT!  I refused to drive on the freeway the first 3 months we lived here.  Most of my driving had been done on sleepy highways and quiet country roads so forget Utah freeways!  In truth I still hate driving on the freeway and I have lived here over 12 years.  Utah drivers are crazy!  I am sure people say that about their own cities but seriously you can see some of the nicest people you have ever met turn into enormous rage monsters once they get behind the wheel.  In Utah they are usually enraged soccer moms. I am no exception to this rule, except the soccer mom part, but I digress... 

When I became pregnant with my first child I read an article by Michael Pollan.  It was about how he had begun to wonder where his food actually comes from and decided to buy a calf and follow its progression from farm to CAFO to plate. It was an amazing, humorous and horrifying glimpse into the world of food production. I ran home and told my hubs all about it.  He wasn't as surprised as I was,  he actually grew up on and worked on a dairy or two.
But it got us both thinking about alternatives to where our food comes from.
Not to long after that I developed asthma and the doctors wanted to put me on a steroid. One of the possible side effects was violent hallucinations. I was breast feeding at the time and suffering from postpartum depression. So violent hallucinations weren't anything I wanted to mess with in any way.  The Dr. dismissed my worries and questions treating me like I was a paranoid idiot.
I called my husband in tears.  Bad enough I was a new mom away from my family,  no real support network,  suffering depression and now I had a Dr who was supposed to help me treating me like I was crazy just because I dared to doubt his word!

I was quickly losing faith in the mainstream food and medical industries.

Luckily for me we have a friend who is a homeopathic practitioner and Chinese medicine specialist.  We threw the meds in the trash and went to her that day.  She was (and still is) marvelous.  She listened to me, didn't dismiss my fears and worries and helped me find a way to control my asthma without meds.

Then I saw the films Food Inc and Super Size Me.  My (food) world was literally rocked off its foundations.  We started reading every Michael Pollan book we could get our hands on and began talking about chickens and getting a place out in the "country". 

Child number two arrived, the housing bubble burst,  the economy crumbled and selling our house so we could move into the country was no longer a possibility.
My children are now 6 and 4. We are still in the same house, living in the semi-ghetto.  We plant a garden every year, which our boys love.  My youngest will eat vegetables but usually only from the garden.
We try to eat mostly plants.  Because we are lower income we don't eat a whole lot of meat, which honestly, considering the things I have learned about the meat industry, is a good thing!
We don't eat out nearly as often as we did before Michael Pollan came into our lives.
In fact my children don't like chicken nuggets or Mac and cheese from a box.  They think the powdered cheese tastes gross!  (Am I doing a happy dance?  Heck yeah! ) They prefer my from scratch Mac and cheese! 
Do they like fast food?  Of course they do, it is manufactured to speak directly to our biology.  Lots of fats, sugar and carbs.  So yes occasionally my kids get a fast food meal but it is usually rare and considered a special treat.  I don't mean to come off like I am better than anyone else because believe me usually all my 4 year old wants to eat is "peanut butter sandwich with honey!" (And 6 times out of 10 I just give in and give him one) I swear he asks for it for every meal and half the time he won't eat what is actually on his plate!  It is frustrating,  I have bribed him with desert.  Doesn't work. I have tried forcing the food into his mouth or tricking the food into his mouth. Doesn't work.  He is one stubborn monster but I have learned if I keep putting the good stuff on his plate he will eat it,  eventually.  It took a YEAR! Yes a whole year! before he would even try carrots,  asparagus or broccoli.  It doesn't usually take most children this long but Sam is nothing if not stubborn!  Which only proves that this is something you inherit. I swear he is my grandpa reincarnated!
My oldest has always eaten his vegetables.  I have never had trouble getting him to eat.  Which, of course, just makes it even more frustrating when DS #2 won't. 
So yes my kids have better eating habits than a lot of their peers,  but trust me if you gave them a choice between cake and a carrot, they would take the cake! LOL!
So my dreams of acres of space for my children to run freely on and not have to worry about traffic (we live on a very busy road) were dashed.  I looked into getting chickens which is actually allowed in our county. However,  the coop must be a ridiculous amount of space from not only our own door but every one of our neighbors doors too. Though with some strategic planning it may yet be a possibility. We can't have roosters (though I know for a fact someone near me does I hear him every morning) and we can only have so many hens but we are only a family of four so we wouldn't need many anyway. 

I am however pretty sure they won't let me get a cow.  (Yes finally we get to the cow!) 

After I had my first son I read a book called The Untold Story Of Milk.  It was a very interesting look at why and how milk became the pasteurized less nutritious substance we are familiar with today and why that may not be a good thing.  So we went looking for raw (unpasteurized) milk.  We found a goat farm, Drake Family Farms (in the middle of Salt Lake City!) that sells raw milk, cheese and yogurt.  Unfortunately it is waaay out of our budget and though we did buy some milk on that visit, we haven't been able to go back.  It is just too expensive for us.  However since reading about the benefits of raw milk, I have wanted to get a cow of my own. 

Crazy right?

A townie who now lives in urban sprawl wants a cow!  What do I know about cows?  Nothing.  Not a thing. All I know is that when they are calves they are super cute!

 
My husband who, as I mentioned before, worked on a dairy has told me that cows are big smelly and stupid. You must,  MUST milk them twice a day or they will also be miserable cows. 
Do I still want one?  YUP!

I want to do a cow share.  They are expensive beasts to buy, feed and to take care of. (At lease I think they probably are, I haven't done a great deal of research into this since I am pretty sure I couldn't have one on my current property)
 
So why not get a group of like minded people who go in together on getting a cow? Buying its feed, paying for the medical whatever and in return they all get a share of the milk, butter, and cheese that comes from said cow? 

There you have it.

My idea for a cow share, way better than a time share in my opinion!  I realize this idea is probably not new or revolutionary in anyway but I still think it's brilliant ;)

My cow would be grass fed (way better for you than corn fed). She would only take medicine when absolutely necessary (no crazy antibiotics regimens for my sweet Bessie Thank you!) and of course because I didn't grow up on a farm I would think of her as a pet. A family member really, rather than just some beast who is here only to serve my needs.

(Yeah I would probably put bows on her ears and dress her up on Halloween too,  but how cute would that be?!)

So that is my fantasy. I know in reality things would be totally different.  I mean in reality you have to muck stalls and other yucky things but I would just delegate that to my hubs! (Which is probably just another fantasy! LOL!) 

So yeah I want a cow and chickens and a goat (a fainting one!) and space and green things.
Someday,  hopefully in the not too distant future, say 3 or 4 years, this dream will become a reality. 

So in the mean time think about it. Wanna go in on a cow together?

(Aren't they cute!? The furry ones are my favorite!)

***here are some links to some of the people, films, books, and cows I mentioned that have changed the way I think about food!***

For all things Michael Pollan:

http://michaelpollan.com

Information about the documentary Food Inc.

http://www.takepart.com/foodinc

Where to buy the documentary Super Size Me:

http://www.amazon.com/Super-Size-Me-John-Banzhaf/dp/B0002OXVBO

The local goat farm! Drake Family Farms

http://www.drakefamilyfarms.com/

Where to buy The Untold Story of Milk (You may be able to find a copy at your local library as well)

http://www.amazon.com/Untold-Story-Milk-Revised-Updated/dp/0979209528

Information on Highland Cattle: (the cute furry ones from the pics!)

http://a-z-animals.com/animals/highland-cattle/

Ramblings from an Easter hangover...With a rant on education for good measure ;-)

Ever have one of those days where you just can't get up the gumption to do anything?  That has been me the last two days!

I kind of wonder if it's an easter hang over...

I was overly ambitious with my culinary endeavors and made several recipes I had never tried before. 
There were strawberry donuts with strawberry glaze and French Toast with strawberry butter and yes we did fall into a sugar coma directly after breakfast and I slept from 10 am until 1pm!
Then I started making my sweet potato gnocchi and as if that isn't time consuming enough I decided to make regular gnocchi because one family member despises sweet potatoes with a passion I have never seen before.  So okay bring on the gnocchi!  It took me all day,  then I had to make the mornay sauce and then roast the asparagus and make the corn bread and the salad,  well actually I forgot the salad to be quite honest.
The gnocchi was a huge success both kinds, tho my boys didn't like the mornay sauce.  And the asparagus was perfection,  the corn bread (a new recipe I was trying,  buttermilk cornbread) turned out sadly flavor less.

Anyway I was so busy I didn't get to hide or find any eggs with my boys :( so next year I will either prep way in advance (which I tried to do this year but forces were conspiring against me) or just do something super simple. 

I feel like although I had a ton of fun in the kitchen I missed out on some serious memory making. 

But with all that frenzied kitchen activity packed into one day,  and the late night playing easter bunny I just couldn't seem to muster up anything more than a cup of tea and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. For every meal and snack!

Monday and Tuesday I honestly didn't want to do anything.  And I mean nothing, nada, zero, zip,  zilch.  No dishes, no meals, no school.  Monday we did manage to get our  lessons in but Tuesday was a failure and it didn't help that my new shiny, as I am going to call it, arrived mid morning on Tuesday.  My new shiny is the Samsung Galaxy note 10.1 and I am loving it, but it definitely has been distracting, for me and my kiddos.  They love all the drawing apps and those damn Angry Birds,  they are addicting! We resisted as long as we could but they have Star Wars Angry Birds!  Star Wars for cripes sake! How is a fangirl supposed to resist?!

Ky and Sam's art done on the new shiny. 

Needles to say we have not been all that productive.

So Monday all we got done was school and one load of laundry. Tuesday we got all the laundry washed-it is currently piled on top of my bed- a load of dishes done, the new shiny explored,  a lot of Justice League,  Yo Gabba Gabba,  and Muppet Babies watched and I made cream of asparagus soup and FINALLY froze my homemade chicken stock. No school but the boys and I just seemed to need a break. 

I hope Wednesday I will have a bit more get up and go. Of course it hasn't helped that it has rained the last few days, being stuck inside can be such a downer, ya know? 

And don't even get me started on my lack of coffee!!!!! Tea just isn't doing it for me. Don't get me wrong I love tea, all kinds but as far as lighting my fire in the morning, give me a good ol' cup of Joe! I have been out of coffee for about a week.  I have a Keurig and we have been researching which would be cheaper,  grinding our own or buying the k-cups.  I have surmised that buying the k-cups from Costco.com is cheaper than any other option.  So I am going to try their new Kirkland breakfast blend.  200 k-cups for $84 that includes shipping etc. If you know of a cheaper alternative by all means throw it at me!  But I love my k-cups and the brew your own filter dealio just doesn't taste as good ya know?

On a totally awesome note my oldest read his first word tonight!

He said,  "Mom what does m-o-o say?

"My response: "well sound it out,  M makes the... what sound?"

He said "mmooo, moo!" 

"That's correct,  do you know what you just did?"

He looked at me then his face lit up like the forth of July and he said excitedly, 

"I readed!?" 

"Yes you did",  I said,  "you read your first word!!"

 I know it is only the word moo but this is serious progress to me, it means my teaching endeavors are paying off and my children will not end up illiterate!  HAPPY DANCE! 

Being new to the whole homeschooling thing I honestly worry about these sorts of things.  And it can be so hard to balance between where public education says my child should be, learning wise, and where his curriculum says he should be.  Don't get me wrong I love our curriculum, we use Oak Meadow in case you were wondering, but sometimes that pressure to have my 6 year old reading The Odyssey and my 3 year old starting on The Shakespeare Sonnets can really mess with my head ya know?

I find it insane that if my sons were in public school they would be expected to know how to do things in kindergarten that I didn't have to know until 1st or 2nd grade.  It's like the experts decided the only way to fix our boken education system was to speed it up,  because that is totally going to work for all the kids currently getting left behind!  

And don't even get me started on the whole no child left behind B.S...er I mean legislation.  ;)

 We will save that for another day possibly in the future, because I honestly did not intend to get up on my educational soap box tonight, but there you have it LOL

Enjoy and remember sometimes you just need to play hookey to refuel and regroup, because we don't want any burnout here Thank you!  :-)

P.S. I totally wrote this entire post on my new shiny! :-D and yeah that makes me super excited! 

I am a bad bad blogger

The title says it all! I am bad at this.
We were so busy last year with homeschooling and preping for my sisters wedding and then our house flooded and we lived in a hotel for 2 long weeks! Then our furnace had to be replaced, and my oldest started refusing to do lessons! All in all it was a pretty crazy year and it definitely kept us on our toes!
So to recap:
My little sister (18 month difference) got married this past summer. I was her maid of honor and had much to do as we live in different states! I was in charge of making her a shrug with her colors and it turned out beautiful in my humble opinion! I also made brackets for the bride and bridesmaids, yup even one for me. And I taught my self how to do some Retro 50's hairstyles. I only did my sisters hair but she looked GOOD! Which amazed me but it is far easier to do someone else's hair than it is to do your own!
The wedding was beautiful and we had a grand time. When we got home we got back into our homeschooling routine for about two days and then our house flooded! Almost all of the flooring had to be replaced! The first week we lived with fans and dehumidifiers going nonstop. It was very hot in my house as it was the end of August and we couldn't run the swamp cooler.
Then 2 weeks in a hotel while they redid the floors and moved everything back in. While that was going on we realized the furnace breeder to be replaced so that was a very expensive welcome home present to us!
Finally tho we were home and able to start up again. There was only one problem...
My oldest started refusing to do lessons. I tried to be patient hoping it was a phase but as days turned into weeks I really had to dig to figure out what was wrong.
Watching him play one day it hit me, as those mommy epiphanys often do, he is bored out of his mind with our current curriculum!
I talked to him about it, asked him what he would like to do and he told me: He wants to read.
I looked at oak meadows first grade curriculum and decided it would be a perfect fit.
I ordered everything I needed including an extra recorder for my youngest. Sounds a bit crazy but I would rather listen to loud off key recorders than I would the fighting that would ensue if I had only gotten one!
Then of course right after Christmas we were hit with the flu. HARD. It has taken 3 weeks and 3 Dr's visits but we are all finally on the mend. So we have resumed our journeys into first grade. So far he seems to be really enjoying it.
It has been difficult for me, I wasn't ready to part with our kindergarten schedule. It was easy and relaxed and only required a few hours of prep time a week.
When I first went through all of the first grade curriculum I felt completely overwhelmed and inadequate. In all honesty it isn't too much different than kindergarten, though it is a bit more intensive. Math (not my favorite thing) is beginning in earnest, and there are lots of science experiments. I think the worst is the one that states I need to find a pond and and take the kids there. "I have to find a pond!?" I wailed at my husband.
I was having flashbacks of sophomore science class and the pond water experiment. Our classroom reeked of pond scum for two months! It was nauseating!
So yeah first grade is more involved, more prep time and more responsibility which scares the crud out of me! But when I think about the alternative, public school, that scares me more than having to teach my boys math!
Now my current problem: my 3 year old who I am trying to do OM preschool with. I feel like I am so focused on the oldest that my youngest is getting the short end of the stick. We include him in all the activities we do and if he isn't interested I let him color or go play.
Do I need to be doing more? He's 3 will be 4 in June and he is very smart, likes to look at books, loves to sing and play games, but he isn't as verbal as his older brother was at this age which is only a problem when we can't understand what he wants.
He seems happy with "school" as it is now so maybe I am just toying with the mommy paranoia and guilt cards.
So far the year is finally looking up and I am hoping it will go a lot more smoothly than last year, or at least have less stress and more blog posts!

How do you manage to teach two children in different grades at the same time?

Goodbyes

Isn't it interesting how all worlds seem to connect? Lately a lot of the blogs I follow have been talking about goodbyes. Specifically with family members. I was going to write about something totally different this week and then I experienced my own goodbye, and my heart has compelled me to write about it.

A few weeks ago I said goodbye to my brother-in-law. He is moving to England. He will be the furthest away of all the family members.  It will be so strange to go home to visit and not have him there with his quick smile and witty observations (always said under his breath)  there will be a definite hole there. 

     My brother in law is a quiet person. He comes from quiet people, as I have discussed before. He is also shy, so I felt a kinship with him, since I am shy myself.  But his spirit/aura/presence, call it what you will, has always been there quietly and gently announcing him.

A constant gentle and loving presence, never forceful or overbearing.

     You know what I mean, something that has always been there and now it will be gone. Obviously not forever! The hope is to see him a few times a year, but after having been there always...it will be WEIRD.

He has been there from the beginning, and by beginning I mean my beginnings with my husbands family. 

15 years. I have known him for 15 years. In that length of time he has become my family, my brother, as real and dear to my as my own brother is. We have been through good times and bad times. Extreme grief and Joy. And I am not even going to mention the time when...well let's just say he is probably scarred for life. ;)

     He is closest in age to my husband and their youngest sister, so he was always there, around the house.  He keeps me up to date on the latest pop culture trends, because honestly other than knowing that Yo Gabba Gabba is the hottest thing for the under 12 set I am pretty out of the loop. His love of Marilyn Monroe is legendary.  In fact I watched Some Like it Hot the first time with him.  We share a love of The Beatles and he makes the BEST bread pudding on the planet, at least in my opinion! 

     Now he will be an entire continent away.  And it makes me quite maudlin.

     I console myself with the fact that he is going to be with his fiance. He is the happiest I have ever seen him, and he now has a quiet confidence he never had before. This makes my heart so happy. Knowing he is so happy and in love and the wonderful changes it has brought about in him. On the other side of that coin of course is the worry that he will have his heart broken, but he is getting married and I must believe in his happily ever after as much as I believe in my own!

So we hung out, talked about his upcoming new life in his new home, and in the end we hugged tightly knowing it would be a year before we saw him again. There is of course Facebook and Skype and email, but it is never really the same is it? However I am grateful for these technologies which allow us to connect over the vast physical distance that separates us.

   And no goodbye is final, not even the last and greatest one. We all meet again, eventually. So we look forward to the day when we can embrace him again and ply him with questions about England over a cuppa. 

Until then we will have to fill that missing piece in us with the memories and laughter and Skype dates. 

And hey now I have a far more compelling reason to visit England, a country I have always wanted to see!
How do you handle tough goodbyes?

Looking at hobbies, obsessions, and a few things in between...

     I was sitting on my couch, reading a few of the blogs I follow and wondering "what in the world am I going to write about this week?" I don't have much on the home school front this week, we are currently fighting off some sort of nasty infectious germies, needless to say it has been a laid back week. So I decided that this week I am going to write about a few of my hobbies (read obsessions). Hobbies keep us sane right? Allow us to be creative and have some time to ourselves to think, to re-engage with our heart space. Now some of my hobbies/obsessions are more of a window shopping variety. As in I love to look but know I can't, and won't buy.  Because with some of my obsessions-what would I do with the stuff? Case in point my first, and probably strangest (unless you are a stage manager) Office supplies. Yup, office supplies!
     When I walk into an office supply store, I get all giddy. I usually say something like "OOOHHH (giggle giggle)" I want one of everything, even if I have no idea what it is for, even if I don't need it. I want it. All those pens and pencils and paper and other stuff that the store easily convinces me I can't live without makes me breathless. Weird? Perhaps. You have to understand when I was in college I was pursuing a degree in Stage Management. It is sort of a prerequisite to be in love with office supply stores they are an essential part of the job. So, for me, I guess it worked out.
      Now however, I am a stay at home-home schooling mom. Now I go to stores like Utah/Idaho Map Supply, it has all those amazing classroom essentials you remember from grade school. The big calender with all kinds of pictures-apples, suns, clouds, birthday cakes, you know the ones! The handwriting paper, the craft supplies, the borders for the bulletin boards...sigh....I lust after it all. In fact if I were rich, and if my husband would let me, my whole house would be decorated with it. Of course I realize how ridiculous it would look to have my entire house look like an elementary school exploded inside it, but it is a nice thought. What else would I do with all of it? LOL So my obsession has gone from office supplies-I don't get to office supply stores much anymore, to Classroom supply stores. My husband is shaking in his steel toed boots!
     The same thing happens to me when I walk into a craft shop, or a yarn store. I get giddy, my heart starts to beat faster, what will I find? What treasure will I see that I can't live without? I love to crochet, knit, cross stitch, and sew. The funny thing is I didn't learn some of this until my early 20's. And sewing is a totally new obsession that I have only begun to explore in the last few years. So no I didn't take Home EC in school. It wasn't required and I had better things to do than learn to be a homebody. I had THEATRE. Yeah I know, pretty pompous, but that would be my 16-17 year old self speaking (Cringe). If I hadn't been such a snob about it I would have had more time and willing teachers to show me how to do things that I now struggle with. Things I have to look up on YouTube to figure out.  Ah the follies of youth!
      My grandmother was an amazing crocheter. She made table cloths, doilies, blankets, she made all my Barbies clothes while growing up and they were way cooler than the stuff at the store. I remember my favorite one looked like that dress Scarlet O'Hara wears, the one made from curtains. Yeah my sister and I fought over that one a time or two. She made me a king size blanket in my favorite color. The thing is huge! Weighs a ton, is super warm and I love it. She made blankets for my babies, in fact she made a whole lot of baby blankets for the great grand children she knew she would not be able to meet.
      She always had bags and bags of yarn, two or three projects going and two or three she was going to start.  When I took up knitting she gave me some antique knitting needles. She had a grandmother, or great grandmother, not sure now, from the old country who made knit lace. She gave me the needles in the hope that I would learn and continue a tradition that had all but died out in our family. My plan was to become good enough to make her some knit lace with the knitting needles. Unfortunately, I ran out of time.
     If I had paid more attention when she tried to teach me things I would be a better crocheter now. My sister-who had the advantage of living close to my grandparents-learned so much from her about crochet, different stitches, how to read patterns. Things I have had to figure out for myself.
Whoa I digress, and am getting all misty! Onward!
     My Doctor introduced me to cross stitch when I was 17, (yeah sounds strange but she was probably the coolest Dr. on the planet and a friend) and I love it! I always have a project or two going, and they usually take me awhile (read years) to finish, but I do love it.
     When my wonderful mother-in-law passed away suddenly a few years ago, I was given her sewing machine. I was touched. It was something I had wanted to try for awhile, and now I had the chance. I put it to good use too. I suppose I felt that I had to prove that I was deserving of such a gift. She did a lot of sewing. Quilts and clothes, Halloween costumes. So I taught, well am still, teaching myself how to sew. I have made several baby blankets and lots of nursing covers in the past few years. I have not been brave enough to try clothes, except for one dress I made for my son's baby doll. LOL. Soon I will try to make a dress, maybe a few Halloween costumes, but not until after my sisters wedding this summer. Too much else to do!
     Not that I am making any clothes for that! I thought about making my own dress, but I am not confident in my ability and I don't want my first attempt at clothes to be for my sisters wedding. How sad would it be as I walked down the aisle with a dress that has three arms or something! LOL Okay so I am not that bad, but I will wait and do something that doesn't need to be that perfect.
Again I digress, sigh...
     Where was I? Oh yes, yarn stores. All those rows of yarn, all different all so colorful! The spark of endless  project possibilities peeking out at you from the bins. Sigh...good thing my hubby took the car today! I am wanting to buy a bunch of yarn just talking about it! And it isn't like I need it. I have two, maybe three big plastic bins of yarn. All just waiting for me to figure out what I am going to do with them! I have several projects I have been working on. A scarf for my husband, yeah I know it is spring time now! I am a slow knitter. A Darth Vader granny square blanket for my eldest son. (It was due on his birthday-a month ago) a shawl for me. And soon I will be starting a cool bracelet for my sister. Oh and lets not forget my nephews cross stitch baby blanket, he will be 1 in May! And his brother is due in June!! Yikes! And my own son's cross stitch baby blanket that I haven't even started on. And the samurai cross stitch to go with my geisha cross stitch. The geisha is finished the samurai just started.
And that is usually how it goes with me! A whole bunch of projects going on at the same time, and a whole bunch of projects waiting in the wings!  Are you like that?
     And I am always looking for new patterns! My favorite website is www.ravelry.com I love it! They have thousands and thousands of free patterns for everything from hats to food! They also have a lot of patterns you pay for, but for the most part they aren't very expensive. It is free to join and you can keep track of your projects, put up pics of the finished products and follow other crochet/knitters and their projects. They are also super helpful if you have questions. If  you love to crochet or knit or if you are just starting you should check it out.
       My other obsession is makeup. For years I never wore any. Oh I would buy it. I would wear it for a few months and then throw it all out and go without any, sometimes for years at a time. Then I started wearing it again a few years ago. The problem? Every time I wore it I got a huge migraine. Weird? Coincidence? Maybe. I did a few experiments. You know, wear it for a few days, go without for a few days, etc...and yeah it was the makeup. Something in the make up was giving me migraines. Can't function, light hurts your eyes, you want to puke migraines.
     What to do? I consulted my friend who is a Homeopath and Chinese medicine practitioner (is that the right word?) and she suggested mineral makeup. I looked into the big name brand Bare Minerals. I wasn't too impressed with them, they added stuff in the make up that I wasn't thrilled about. And then I found Alima Pure. (Cue the  trumpets, choir and flying cherubs.)  There is nothing extra in their make up just pure minerals, and they have the most magnificent colors!
     I was at first take aback at the price of mineral make up in general. "20 bucks for foundation!! You're kidding right?" But I took the plunge ordered some samples and fell in love! 20$ for foundation, but let me tell you, I have had mine for over 6 months and it is still mostly full! It lasts forever! Now I admit I do not wear it all the time. There are days, sometimes weeks when I don't wear any make up at all. But I wear it more often that not simply because it doesn't feel like I am wearing anything at all. Which I absolutely love!
     Now here is where the problem comes in. They have a beautiful range of colors in their eyeshadow, just gorgeous, and sometimes-I just can't resist. I think I have enough eyeshadow that I will be leaving it to my sons when I die! (Hopefully they have daughters!)  And I love their brushes. They usually have a new one on sale every week. I have been refraining from buying any, because well, I have what I need. But we have been bred to be consumers right? It is really hard to draw the line between need and want sometimes, especially with your obsessions! :)
     But I am trying to cut back, being a grown up can be such a pain sometimes! LOL. I haven't bought anything in awhile because well, I don't actually need it. And that is what I tell myself every time I get a new email from them. Sigh...it would be nice but...I don't really need it.  (I am on a mission to consume less, trying to become better at distinguishing need from want.  Anyone else out there working on that?)
     The other thing I love is that they send you samples with every purchase. If I already have them I send these on to my mother and sister, who I have now corrupted with my love of Alima! If you are interested you can check them out at www.alimapure.com but I warn you it can become an addiction ;) (Come over to the dark side heehee.)  So proceed at your own risk.

*I am not a spokesperson for Alima Pure, they don't pay me (I wish LOL) and all of the above is just my opinion. Nor am I a paid spokesperson for ravelry.com, I just love their website*

Sweet boy

My oldest boy made this for me yesterday. He said if I smelled it my migraine would go away. How sweet!

Yesterdays post today

     Today has been one of "THOSE" days. 
You know the ones? The kids are screaming, and whining from the moment they get up, they fight, they cry, the lack of milk in their sippy cups is an all consuming world catastrophe, drama drama drama! (Who knew boys would be such over dramatic divas!?) I think I have played referee more today than anything else. In fact I know my husband is going to say "What!? Didn't you do anything today!?" the minute he walks in the door.
     Honestly it has taken almost all my energy just to keep the kids from destroying each other and the world.  Housework was the furthest thing from my mind. For the record I did manage to get a load of dishes going and the corned beef is is in the oven!  And school you may ask? Well I took a cue from another Home school blog I like to read and decided it would be a "bare-bones" school day. We watched documentaries on the universe and did a bit of Spanish language practice. Yeah pretty laid back today...but then most of my day has been divided between the refereeing and cleaning up after my two year old. He has a horrible habit of throwing his food onto the floor if he decides he is either 1) done, 2) not going to eat it period, or 3) bored. And while my dog is in heaven I am not. ;-)
       It doesn't matter what I do on days like today, they will fight regardless. The oldest wants a "secret hide out" so I make him one. Then they proceed to fight over it. So I make the youngest a "secret hideout" of his own, and they still manage to fight over it! There is still crying and screaming and hitting and spitting, and occasionally biting. And don't forget the classic, "Nobody loves me, I want my daddy!" It is enough to make me pull my hair out, except that I'm a wimp and that would hurt! 
     So needless to say my patience, which I have never been blessed with an abundance of, was wearing very thin.  Some days it is all too much and I end up doing a lot of yelling. (Ahem, Today.) Which I know, in my more rational moments, is never helpful.   I am a loud person who comes from a family of loud people who do tend to speak, well, loudly. I also come from a theatre family and have been trained so that I may be heard all the way to the cheap seats. Is it my fault I have an overdeveloped diaphragm? All kidding aside, I do yell far more than I like.
     This is something I have been working on for many years, and I am definitely better than I used to be, but I forget more often than I remember. My particular religion is very much about loving kindness, compassion, and not doing any harm, as most religions are. But growing up in an environment where raising your voice was not out of the ordinary does not condition one to talk softly, nor did I learn how to deal with my anger effectively. (I realize that this makes it sound like all my family does is yell and scream, which is not the case, as my sister so eloquently put it "we just make sure we are heard even if it means escalating our volume to do it") My problem is it is my default setting when my children misbehave and that is something I wish to change. 
     So for 9 years I have been trying to retrain myself.  Sometimes I feel like I am doing really well and other times I am back at square one. Trying to recondition 20-some odd years of projecting ones voice is really hard to do! My husbands family is exactly the opposite. They are probably the quietest people I have ever met. (Truthfully they were probably scared to death the first time I opened my mouth!) I would like to be somewhere in the middle. Not too loud, not too soft, just where I need to be, the middle path.  But how in those moments of insanity when the kids are screaming and crying and spitting water all over the place (true story) do you keep it together enough to not give in to that first initial response:  raising your voice? How do you maintain a peaceful center in the midst of the storm?
      I have tried all sorts of things to find/maintain a peaceful center on days like this. Anything from, singing, to playing video games, to eating large quantities of chocolate, to the much talked about "Mommy time out". The truth is none of these seem to work. When I come back into the room I do not have a true sense of peacefulness. It is as they say, only skin deep, and quickly disappears in the wake of another trying situation.
What does help is meditating, but that takes time and sometimes, especially on days like today, there just isn't any.  So what do I do?  Well I stumbled upon something today, quite by accident, that I hope provides the answer, at least for me. I was close to exploding (again) and knew I was going to start yelling if I didn't find some sort of calm when I suddenly visualized myself meditating. I am not sure why, I didn't do it on purpose it just sort of popped into my head. Me sitting on a cushion and meditating, in a quite, peaceful place. And suddenly I felt grounded and focused and better able to handle the situation.
     Is this some sort of weird fluke? Will it work again? I have no idea! I only know it worked this time. I am feeling a bit superstitious about it, so I will definitely try to sit down and meditate tonight after the kids are asleep, don't want to mess with the meditation mojo. And I will be trying it again in the future to see if it will indeed still work.  I'll let you  know, in the meantime what works best for you on "THOSE" days?